Friday, April 21, 2006

A Rough Morning

Yesterday I watched the coach's kids. Lately Malachi, the younger of the 2 (8 mos.) has been VVVVVVVVVVVERY clingy--suffers terribly from "separation anxiety." So the past--o, I don't know--5 times I've been there, he cries and cries and is really fussy.

WELL! Yesterday was the worst day yet. Kelley left at 12:10, and Malachi started screaming immediately. I mean screaming. Red faced, gurpy, make-your-throat-raw screaming. "Here we go again," I thought. When I picked him up, he screamed more loudly. Put him down with toys--screamed. Changed diaper--screamed and writhed. Tried to feed--screaming, arching his back, spitting food out... you get the idea.

Now, I have been babysitting and working in nurseries and nannying for some time now, and I think I've got pretty steely nerves when it comes to this. Like I said, he's been doing this a lot lately. I'm proud of the fact that I have not yet called Kelley at work to say, "Help! What do I do!??" 'Cause mostly I know what to do! Check diaper, try feeding, check for twisted clothing, cuddle, leave alone, give toys, try to rock or walk, etc, etc, etc...

Well, it didn't stop. It didn't even let up, not even a little. I had long since stopped feeling sorry for him. He was just furious--that's all. Then I thought, "I am so mad and frustrated! What kind of mother am I going to be!?" I told myself, "It's different, though. Malachi's not mine; it'll be different with mine. Everything's different with your own, right?" But I'm not so sure.

When he had been screaming for an hour and 40 minutes, I called Nate, almost in tears. I expected him to say, "Hang in there; you'll be okay. Just keep trying things." Instead, he said, "Call her! Just call her, and if she offers to come home, thank her and be ready when she gets home!" Hmm.

Well, I was still too proud to admit I couldn't calm him. But when the screaming had gone on for 2 hours, I had had enough. I picked up the phone and dialed the first 2 digits, and then I looked at Malachi. His eyes were droopy and he was nodding. Man. I put the phone down, picked him up (enter screaming anew), and put him in his crib. After 2 little whimpers, he was out like a light. And then he slept for almost 2 hours.

And now I'm nervous. I've never expected to have an angel. But what if I have a screamer? O, I know they all scream sometimes and have bad days. And I know they don't stay babies forever. But boy... if I have to listen to nonstop screaming all day every day...

WHEW! Guess I'd better brace myself and pray, pray, pray for the best!

10 comments:

TwoMuths said...

Yikes! Proof that the sin nature comes with the kid! way to go with hanging in there, Karen. One day at a time, right? And I'm sure there will be days when we will have to do one minute at a time! :-) Pending motherhood is a little scary sometimes, that is for sure!

Shyla said...

holy sin nature batman!!

i was getting annoyed just reading it! I was riding home with my friend wendy who just had her baby 5 weeks ago and he was crying and crying in the car and I thought to myself "i am not going to be able to handle this!" turns out his little hat fell over his eyes and he was sad....poor guy!! :)

I think as mom's we have a big part in the countenance and attitude of our kids. It's a real point of conviction for me and a real reminder to keep my attitude in check and submitted to Christ and that a cheerful heart makes a happy face!

You'll do just fine...you've had more practice than most of us ever had!!

Shannon said...

Karen - It's different when it's your own! :) I'm sure you here that all the time. It's not necessarily different in a good way, but just different, and other mom's could comment on that. Crying bothered me too when I was pregnant, but now I'm so calloused to it, I don't even pay attention when I hear kids screaming in cars, restaurants, etc. It is one day at a time, but it's SOOOO worth it. Good for you for figuring out that he was tired. Esther gets like that when she's tired. These poor little ones get so worn out, they can't tell us, but sleeping is a learned art and now she goes to sleep on her own w/o crying..It's so nice!

Karen said...

Thanks, gals! I needed that!

Vicki said...

Wow! Sounds stressful, also sounds like you handled it well. You're a trooper!

Your own child's cry will not seem near as loud as other people's either! ;)

carissa said...

WOW Karen, you are ready for motherhood! The screaming is especially hard in the night....but, praise God daddy's snoring right next to ya!!! :) A couple HARD nueges will wake him right up and you'll at least have help :) Now you know what to do, put him in his crib immediately and hopefully, he'll sleep or know you're not putting up with it!! It's so good to see your picture. You look beautiful. Congrats on the baby girl!!

carissa said...

I said, nueges....I meant NUDGES, punches, kicks..whatever.. wake him up! :) love ya.

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Katie said...

Karen, I guess I'm late in reading all of my peeps' blogs lately. I take it as a good sign that I have a life. ha ha

It was really easy for me to get annoyed and even feel self-righteous about other kids crying before I had Luke, but afterwards, I realized, that even my little sweetie-pie can throw a tantrum with the best of them. Since I've had Luke, I'm VERY slow to cast judgement on other parents, because Lukie can be a pill sometimes!

It is true, it's different and easier when it's your own. It's not always easy, because they still are boogers sometimes, but you have more discipline/training time. And, some babies are just more prone to crying than others. Luke cried A TON when it was nap time, but has otherwise been an EXTREMELY happy and content baby/boy. I read the book On Becoming Babywise before I had Luke, and benefited from it greatly. I know people who hate the book, but I would've been a mess without the things I learned from it. (I don't think the principles are original to that book; they're just pretty common-sense, something a lot of people lack these days!) There are some disclaimers to be said about the book, but nothing that some moderation can't handle. (I'd also put a big disclaimer about the author personally, but the book still has some great principles to offer.) Since Luke has gotten out of that stage, I've heard some good things about the book The Baby Whisperer. From what I've heard, it's a good balancing act to Babywise. I plan on buying it before my next one comes along.

Who knows, maybe Livvie will be a passive, beauty who doesn't cry a lot! :)

Sorry about the long comment. :)

Karen said...

Thanks again, ladies! I knew I could get some insight and encouragement from you! Katie, I have heard lots of good things about On Becoming Babywise--I think I'll pick that one up!